Behind the Face

Behind every face is a story and there are a lot of times where we don’t know the story.  We see the bright eyes and charming smile, but we don’t see inside, to the heart that may be breaking apart.

A few years back I knew a girl who smiled a lot. A girl who appeared to be happy, but she wasn’t. A girl who reached out for help, but was met by closed doors. Why the closed doors?  The Mom refused to believe that her daughter was hurting. Others agreed, for after all this girl was from a “good” family, a “good” church, why would she have any problems?

Sounds crazy doesn’t it? Why are we so quick to assume that if you have good things in life that you must not have anything to struggle about! It’s crazy, but I see it happen all the time. We look at ones who live in grand houses and always dressed to a T and think, “Gee, they must have it made!” When in reality the house may be big and spacious, but totally devoid of love, making the person feel very empty inside.

People of every size, shape and color face times of struggle and can feel depressed. That little boy that sits in the cafeteria alone every day, can be just as lonely as the bubbly girl who is surrounded by a group of friends. We can’t see their hearts, by just looking at their face. We need to see behind their eyes and if they let you in to see that, don’t turn them away.

Don’t make light of their troubles, for to them they may be big. Be the one who listens and who can help lift them up, so that when they smile again, it can reflect their heart!

I am so grateful to the ones who have lifted me up in life, when I have needed a helping hand. The ones who have made me truly smile again!

Today, I think again about that girl I once knew and wonder what happened to her. I pray that she has found or will find someone who she can open her heart too. I also pray for the reader who may need someone to see into their heart, and to lend them a helping hand. Know that there are those who care, you are not alone!

33 thoughts on “Behind the Face

  1. Well said. So many times, an individual is pre-judged based on so much superficial information. That fashionably dressed individual can have just the same issues as that person sitting on the street corner in dirty jeans and tshirt. Outward appearance has no bearing on who the person really is, or how educated they are, or whether they are using drugs etc. etc. etc. If you really want to get to know somebody,,then befriend them and listen to them. Learn about them. If you cannot be bothered to do that, then don’t criticize or label them in some way.
    I worked for a little over two years in a crisis intervention unit at a major Toronto hospital and it quickly became obvious that despair and desperation knows no limits. It can affect the young and old, the affluent and the poor, the well dressed and the sloppy … and bridged a cross section of the cultural mix here.
    We are all unique individuals, and we must remember that when we are tempted to “label” another person.

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    • I absolutely agree! I teach bullying prevention, social skills, drug prevention education to k-8th grade students and I often discuss pre-judging others without really getting to know them and how we label them based on how they look, where they come from, how they dress, talk….etc. I start really having good conversations with kids as young as 3rd grade on a level they can truly understand. I’ve even had some really basic level discussions with kindergarten and 1st graders, at that age they’re so innocent. It’s so interesting to watch their attitudes and opinions change as they grow older and are influenced by adults and kids around them.

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  2. I’ve found there’s a lot of enjoyment to be had by trying to live someone’s life vicariously for a few moments. It may not solve all the mystery about them, but it at least cracks opens a door and makes me more receptive to their inner lives. And sometimes vice-versa.

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  3. A lovely post, and so true, especially at this time of year. Hubby and I love to people watch and learn a lot from someone’s body language when the face and smiles may say otherwise.
    I care about people, and if someone is hurting want to help if I can, even if, as you say, it is just lending a listening ear.

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  4. Very touching post! To add on to your post, too often in society every day we ask each other how we’re doing in passing …we say things like “good” or “fine” and yet, in reality, theirs much bubbling under the surface waiting to pour out. Our social protocol says to keep everything light we don’t want to burden with our troubles or we’re afraid of being judged. We definitely don’t know what others are going through on the inside or in their personal lives and we shouldn’t make light of their problems nor judge them. Again, very impactful post! 🙂 ❤️️

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  6. A much needed reminder to leave the judgement of others to the judiciary, and even they don’t always get it right. Many things that my Father told me as I was growing up have stayed with me and served me well. One of the best was said during my years of teenage angst, when human nature perplexed me the most and made me jump to hasty conclusions…”Everyone has a story, many remain untold.” While the exterior shows one thing, the interior may contain something else. Thank-you!

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