Does your Child know?

I work at a Daycare and yes some days it gets tiring. My co-worker and I will look at each other and say, “Okay, we are done”, as our little cherubs are running around testing the power of their lungs. It can get a little crazy as one keeps pulling off their shoes and the other one is having a meltdown. A meltdown because someone sat in the chair that  he wanted to sit in. Yes, the chairs do look exactly alike, but apparently that doesn’t matter. Think with a toddler’s logic now. Hmmm… I know some adult’s that still think with a toddler’s logic, but that is a different post. 🙂

Then there is nap time which is supposed to be a time of peace. The peace does come, but only after having to get your class of 7 toddlers to calmly lay down and go to sleep. A much easier task some days than others! Little Johnny is crying for he wants his pacifier, but Mommy and Daddy don’t want him to have it  anymore. They are breaking him from it. Little Sarah wants her special blankie which was forgotten at home. At last they do settle down and your heart melts at how your precious, slumbering angels look when asleep.

I do enjoy my job. Being showered with hugs and sloppy kisses. Always knowing that you will be guaranteed laughs by something that is said or done. Kids are natural comedians!

My job is fun. I can finger paint, play with play dough  and read books as I cuddle with a little one on my lap and 1 by my side. Yes, all that is true, but there are days where my heart strings are tugged and I feel a little sad. Yesterday was one of them. It was because of what was witnessed happening between one of our 4 year old’s  and her Dad. We have infants to age 5 in our Daycare. It is neat to watch the toddler that I had in my class of  2 year old’s,  grow and move up to the preschool classroom. This was one of those . A little girl.

This little one was sent home the day before due to vomiting. The stomach bug has been going around and I always hold my breath when that happens, for I so don’t want it! Well she was brought back the next day. It wasn’t much later until she vomited again in front of her class. She was crying tears of embarrassment, but also sad tears. She told her teacher how Daddy would be upset that she was sick, because he didn’t like missing work. He was called and sure enough that was his response. He knew he had to come and get her though, for that is our policy. Yes, we know it can make it inconvenient, but we also know how quickly germs can spread!

As the little girl was leaving, her teacher said that she hopes she feels better. The little one was crying because of feeling so bad and her Dad’s response was that he hopes so to, because he has to work!

I am not trying to offend anyone with this post.  I know parents have to work. I know that it is not practical for everyone to stay at home with their little kids. This is not a battle about the working vs. stay at home parent!

The point of this post is to point out how our words can affect our children. That little girl was sick, something she could not help. She was 4 years old and she should not have had to worry about how her Dad would feel about picking her up! He may have had very real concerns about work, but right then and there that little girl needed a comforting hug. Right then and there she needed to know that she was loved, and not seen as an inconvenience  in his day.

I am a parent of 2 teenagers. I know I have said things before that I shouldn’t have as they were growing up. We do it, we aren’t perfect. We make mistakes. This isn’t about making mistakes, it is about developing a pattern which I have seen with more than 1 parent. I have heard things out of the children’s mouths before that break my heart, have seen pictures they have drawn that can speak louder than words.

Our Director often reminds us of how in a lot of cases we spend more time with these kids then their parents do. She says that not to make the parent feel bad, but to show us how much of an impact we can make on the children entrusted into our care. I take that seriously and I want to do my best. There is truth though in the statement that I can never make up for the parent. My love for the child cannot take the place of a parent’s love. This isn’t about making mistakes and feeling guilty about them.  It is only about making sure your child knows they are loved. That they are valuable and precious, and that you being entrusted with raising them is the MOST IMPORTANT JOB that you will ever have!

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15 thoughts on “Does your Child know?

  1. Good Post! I am always surprised, and disappointed at the amount of times that I have heard a parent complain about the cost of full-time daycare. They are giving the daycare the full responsibility of their off-spring, so I like to ask “Just what is your child worth per month?” Of course there is no definitive answer from the parent and yet, in the event of any oversight/negligence, they will immediately seek legal advice!
    Some parents really need a good shake, and then perhaps they will understand that the child they had by choice is a responsibility which far outweighs anything else in their lives. If you do not want the responsibilities and inherent limitations of children… then don’t have any!
    ps. Don’t adopt a dog either as they are also a responsibility and will interfere with your life-style!

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thanks Colin! Yes you are so right about the “good shake” that some parents need. Believe me, I have had to bite my tongue several times.
      Yes, there is a simple answer to not wanting to have the responsibility of a child. You said it well, and it does ring true about dogs as well! Unfortunately so many children and dogs suffer due to the irresponsibility of those that they look to to take care of them.

      Liked by 1 person

      • My mom once said that before having children, it’s good to spend some time taking care of a dog because that gives at least some idea of how much responsibility there is! And yes, both children and dogs know more of what’s going on than people give them credit for. My daughter’s dog is very sensitive, hates being left alone even if it is just for a few minutes, and will make sad little noises if she sees us getting ready to go somewhere without her.

        Liked by 2 people

    • Wanted to comment on the other good comment you made about the money. OH Yes, I have heard the complaints. I love your question to the parents about how much is their child worth!
      And as far as the seeking legal advice thing. Hasn’t happened yet from any of our parents, BUT…. there are kids that we are EXTRA careful to watch because of knowing how Mom and Dad will react if Junior gets hurt. Now Junior can hurt themselves at home and come to the daycare with a bruise,etc. BUT OH NO if he falls down at recess here or another child bumps into him, etc. You get the picture.

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  2. Thank you for sharing this JR. It made me think about our priorities in life. Children should always know they are a parent’s top proirity, not work. Yes, Dad needs to make money, but as you said the little girl cannot help she is sick. I think for this reason, we have sick leave at work. I’m not sure how it works there, but here it’s one-day a month.

    Liked by 2 people

      • That’s pretty awful. I’ve never heard of no sick days anywhere in Canada. When paying someone a salaried position, employers have to give them 1 sick day/month. Plus, many places will also allow at least a couple of mental health days. A year. That’s very sad, you shouldn’t be docked pay if you have take care of your sick child once and a while or God forbid, you become ill. And you shouldn’t have to use a vacation day either, unless they give you more to begin with to compensate for sick days?

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      • Unfortunately there are many people who are hourly paid and are in a no hours = no pay situation. Then of course there are the many self-employed people so here, in Canada, there are many people with this issue. The solution however is to recognize that particular aspect of ones work and plan accordingly.
        Is this really any different between those whose work includes a pension plan vs those whose work does not? We’re all going to be retiring, voluntarily or otherwise, at some point in time so it is prudent to plan for it as early as possible.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Yes, you’re right planning for the future is key and hourly employees don’t often have these benefits in any country. I guess I just wish the Dad in the story had planned to have days available for his sick kids. I know he’s probably just trying to make a living and provide, but the little girl cannot help she is sick, so Dad shouldn’t be mad. He should as you say, have money aside for days he has to miss and for the future. But I also think, for some people, especially if the job market is competitive and jobs are few, don’t always gave this option. So I think of that as well.

        Liked by 2 people

  3. So sad that she would have to be sad to make her dad upset. So wrong. Great thoughtful post. Those parents are fortunate to have a caregiver like you! But you are right. Nothing replaces the parents love. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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