Why Do We Judge?

The question should not be whether we believe her or not. The question instead should be why do we feel the need to judge her?

There has been a news story recently that has caused a lot of stir. There is a man who is very close to becoming a Supreme Court judge. There is one thing though that now  has come to light.  A lady has stepped forward saying that this nominee for the Supreme Court sexually assaulted her many years ago.

It has been the topic on all kinds of social media and the one thing that gets said over and over again is “Why did she wait so long to come forward?”  Which is followed by this popular answer, “Well obviously she is lying if she waited this long to say anything.”

This answer has so many problems with it and it brings me back to my first question, “Why do we feel the need to judge her?” And this isn’t just about her, its about every female that has dared to step forward admitting  to being sexually assaulted.

We wonder why more young girls and women don’t step forward, the answer is simple. Who wants to risk getting raked over the coals again and suffer shame and humiliation,  after already going through a traumatic experience!

I think of the women who are reading the discussions on social media about this case, and listening to the news reports about this woman stepping forward. The women who are reading and thinking to themselves, “me too”, “that happened to me”. The women who are silently cringing inside as they read all the negative publicity that this woman is dealing with now.  Do we really have to wonder why more people don’t come forward?

Why are we so quick to judge? So quick to throw that stone. Why are we so quick to say, “well if it would have been me… I would have….”  Really? You know exactly what you would have done if the same thing had happened to you?  We can say all we want about  what we would have done, but until you are in that situation you really don’t know. People respond to traumatic situations in so many different ways!

Where is our compassion instead of our judging heart? That can be said in a lot of other situations as well, not just sexual assault cases.

Why is it that we are so quick to decide what someone’s whole story is when a lot of times we only know half the story?

Can you imagine how much better this world would be if we were as quick to show compassion as we are to judge? As quick to give a helping hand as we are to tear someone down.

I think these 2 quotes sum things up pretty well.

 

 

 

 

Ice Cream Sundae’s and Thingamajigs

I had a dream last night that is stuck in my head and I thought I would share it.

I was in a big building with lots of people. I was sitting at a table looking at a magazine and there was a man sitting next to me. We started talking  and I was telling him about something that my child really would like, but that I had no clue how to make it.  I was looking at the magazine for instructions. No more was said and I went back to reading the magazine.

The next thing I knew he grabbed the magazine away from me. It was only laying on the table in front of me, so he hadn’t grabbed it out of my hands, but still he knew I was reading it.  I was shocked, but it wasn’t long until he gave it back.  Once more I went back to reading and a few minutes later he took it again. Well this time I was rather upset and I just grabbed another magazine while thinking how rude he was being.  He gave me the magazine back again and he left without saying a word. I can’t say that I was sorry to see him go.

Some time passed and I got myself an ice cream sundae. Actually I don’t remember getting up to get it , it just kind of appeared in front of me. Real life should be like dreams, think of what you want and instantly it appears!

After I finished my ice cream the man appeared in front of me again, but this time he had something in his hand. He laid it down in front of me and I was speechless. He had made what I had wanted to make for my child. It was perfect and I thanked him so much and realized how wrong I had been about him. Moments before my heart had been filled with irritation at him,  and now it was filled with gratitude.  I knew that I would have never been able to make the thing, even with instructions

I wish I could describe for you what the thing was, but I really have no clue.  All I know is  that it was a complex thingamajig. It had a little motor in it, some kind of fan that made another little strange thingamajig move back and forth. This thingamajig that blew back and forth was connected to the back of something which resembled a person. I remember that the person like thing appeared to be smiling and that their hair was standing straight up, but that’s it.

The moral of the dream :  Don’t be too quick to judge, even when you don’t understand why someone is doing what they are doing. You may be surprised at their motive! What “the thing” was supposed to be? What it meant?  Well, I believe we may never know that answer, unless any of you have an idea about it that you want to share. Feel free to share below.