The Last Letter

I am sitting here with a pen in my hand trying to find the words to convey the turbulent emotions of my heart.  How can I make you see what lies inside my soul? My hand trembles as I try to write, but write I must, no longer can I put it off. I swallow my fear and instead I try to focus on how you looked the last day we were together.

I remember every detail of how you looked, from the vivid sea green color of your eyes to the way your sweet smile showed off your dimples. We had such a wonderful day, you were so carefree. You had not a clue at what was to come.

You were so delightful, that you even caused me to forget for a time what was coming. I wanted to freeze each moment and just stop time. To whisk you off to some secluded island where time would stand, still oh beautiful love of mine!

That day was one I will forever hold dear. The sun shined brighter and the sky was bluer as we walked in the park hand in hand. I tried to memorize the how soft your hands felt, knowing it would be so long until I was able to feel them again, and not knowing for sure if I ever would.

My heart breaks knowing the pain that my sudden departure surely caused you. I could barely stand it knowing that because of me your eyes lost their shine.

Many a night my own eyes cried with the heartache of missing you.

If it wasn’t for the memories that I bottled up in my heart of you I don’t know how I would have ever made it through!

Now my heart is overflowing with anticipation at seeing you again, but also has me a nervous wreck, for will you even want to see me?  Is your love for me still so very strong or have you fallen into the arms of another? Will you understand why I had to leave, will you even give me a chance to explain?

Oh darling, I could explain in this letter but words are failing me. I am pleading with you you will consent to seeing me at least once again. That you will give  me a chance to explain the necessity of my sudden departure.

I leave it up to you my love, you have the final say, and I will respect your wishes.

I will wait with nervous anticipation for your answer and no matter what it is, the sweet memories of our wondrous love will forever live in my heart. Memories that I can pull out whenever my skies are gray.

Forever yours,

Rollo