I have experienced 2 incidents recently that once again caused me to have bewilderment. Bewildered by what people do and the ways they justify their actions.
Justifying our behavior starts when we are toddlers. Toddlers will bite, hit, push and scream and will give you what they think is a perfectly good reason as to why they did it. Someone had the toy they wanted, someone was sitting in the chair that they wanted to sit in. The list goes on and on.
These clearly aren’t reasons that justify bad behavior, but in their minds they think so. Unfortunately in this world we have adult sized toddlers running around using toddler logic to justify their behavior. It doesn’t help when these adult sized toddlers hold leadership positions of where they are supposed to be role models!
Why do we justify our bad behavior instead of accepting responsibility for our actions? Where is the logic behind our reasoning? Is there any? As we get older the situations that upset us change. They change, but at the same time can have a similarity to what we dealt with as children.
“That person wasn’t nice, they cut me off in traffic. I am going to ride their bumper now, I’ll show them!” ( “Johnny butted in front of me in line, so yes I pushed him down!”)
“I was the one that was supposed to get the promotion. They had no right to give it to him! He is going to wish he had turned down that promotion!” (“He is sitting in my chair! The red chair that belongs to me, not this blue one! Next time you sit in my chair I will bite you twice!”)
“It is all about my desires. I have to do whatever it takes to fulfill them, no matter what!” ( “It is all about me and what I want!”, says the toddler screaming on the floor)
Do we really believe that all these reasons justify our actions? Do we really believe that we are innocent of any wrongdoing, or do we know that we are lying to ourselves? Have we lied to ourselves so often to ease our guilty conscience that we now believe the lies?
That when we are held responsible for our actions we now feel like we are being framed. We feel that whoever got us into trouble is out to get us. We make up reasons as to why they may not like us.We toss and turn in bed worrying about the trouble that we are now in, unable to see what led us to this point.
Have we dug ourselves so many holes that we now are falling into them? Falling into them, and finding that they are too deep to jump out of.
In the 2 incidents that are fresh in my mind, there really is no way to justify the actions of the 2 different individuals. No matter how you look at it, there is no reasonable rationale, but try telling them that.
Are there logical answers to any of these questions? What do you think?