Sometimes when you are sitting in the dark, well there is light from the computer; your mind thinks back to moments.
Not just any moments, but ones that you know your heart will remember forever. You won’t remember them due to where you were at, or what fabulous adventure you were having. No, you remember them simply due to the words that were said; or the power of words not spoken.
As I have mentioned in previous posts, these past 2 years have been very difficult ones for our family due to certain circumstances. You can go to But I am not dreaming!for a closer glimpse at what I am saying. Through these hard times, there have been moments that have stood out and in the still of this night have come back to me. You can also read this post to help give you a picture. A year ago…
It was the moment that we embraced tighter than ever before, as if we were holding on for dear life. And honestly we were, for every fiber of my being did not want to let go of my dear child! The silent tears streamed down, though I said I was going to be brave. The moment of the long car ride, where you could hear a pin drop and cut the pain flowing from our hearts with a knife. It was the strength of my husband’s hand, as it held mine and we drove unable to speak.
The moments on the porch swing in each others arms looking into the sky wondering what in the world is happening and what is to come?
But these moments aren’t about the sadness, its about the power of love in the moments when you are at your worst. It’s about knowing the love runs deep enough to survive the raging storm.
The love is in the cup of tea and bowl of soup lovingly made by your husband. Made as I am wrapped in a blanket shaking in every fiber of my being. Not from sickness, not from cold, but from shock! My heart held up for when it needed to, but when it was all over and my task had been completed; that is when my body reacted to the stress.
Love is there standing in a garage, as I collapse in his arms; saying I can’t go through this again! No more words are needed,only the strong arms holding me up.
Love is in the words spoken after a funeral as we go to bed at night. “You won’t leave me too soon, will you?”
It is in the moment of of talking about going on adventures once we have more time to travel and in the next words hearing, “Don’t go to the hospital again!” Your eyes meet and you wonder where that came from, for its been 4 years! It comes from the heart, the memory not forgotten. It was a scary time of not knowing for sure what the future held. It was a time again of more tears shed, as we sat on a hospital bed.
Yes, there have been tears, lots of them. But the tears have have proven the love stronger! The tears have shown the depths of the love and have not put out the flames of the heart!