In a Perfect World….

/ joyroses13

Good Morning friends! Yesterday in my post I asked for suggestions for opening sentences to do a story around. This one was contributed by my friend from the  PonderTheirrelevant blog. She said, “In a perfect world…..would not exist because.”  Thanks for the suggestion!

In a perfect world disrespect would not exist, because disrespect is what causes an avalanche of problems!

If we respected each other, would we physically harm each other? If the parent respected the child would they abuse them, and if the spouse respected their spouse would they abuse them? NO! How can you respect someone and treat them so badly? If we respected each other would hate crimes exist? NO,  for respecting that person means you see them as having value,  even if you don’t agree with them. That you believe  they don’t have to be like you! Respecting each other is doing away with stereotypes, like a friend blogged about recently.

In a perfect world you wouldn’t be turning on your news at night to hear of another school shooting, sexual assault, robbery and murder. Those things would be in the past, for disrespect would no longer exist. Our eyes would no longer be blinded by our self righteous attitudes of who we think deserves respect and who we think doesn’t.

Respect isn’t something you pick and choose. You respect the janitor at the school as much as the Principal! You respect your elders and the ones younger than you. Respect and simple courtesy to others is really not hard, but in this crazy world we seem to have forgotten it.

People are in a hurry to move up the ladder of success, not caring who they step on. People are upset at what life has thrown at them, and they decide to take their anger out on innocent people. Majority of the school shootings that have happened had nothing to do with who the victims  were. They were just in the wrong place at the wrong time when someone decided that they had enough; gonna take care of all their suppressed anger by shooting a gun, destroying innocent lives.

It is scary how we can become almost numb to the horrible things we hear on the news. This was felt last night, as my husband  informed me once again  of another school shooting. I remember the great shock I felt when hearing about the very first school shooting at Columbine in Colorado.  It seemed unreal that someone would perform such  an evil act. A act that took so many lives from a place that was supposed to be safe!

But now, since that time the shock is no longer there. It did spring up again when in Arkansas the shooting happened in a Kindergarten class, for Gosh those kids were just starting out their lives!

Horribly tragic is the only word to describe these shootings that are now happening so often, that the shock is no longer there. It’s really bad when even other countries know  how bad the US school shootings are! Not something we especially wanted to be known for, but the fact can’t be disputed. You feel the sorrow and pain for the victim’s family and friends but no longer are you stunned by it! And that is so wrong!

I really didn’t plan on talking about school shootings, but it fits. For if the shooter never had felt disrespected in life, would that anger rage in him? And if he had respect for others, would he have been able to point the gun and pull the trigger while looking into that person’s eyes? Or would he have seen that person as someone’s else’s daughter, son, brother, sister?

AHH, yes if only we could have the perfect world by clicking our heels together 3x like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. We can’t, but we can do our part! We can show respect to that one who is different than us. To the one we may not agree with. No one is saying that everyone has to be your close friend. No, just the courtesy of mutual respect can go a long way! Remember that as you go about your day! You may not be able to change the world, but you can change someone’s life. You never know who really may need to see that smile from you and hear your kind tone. It might be the only smile they get all day!

19 thoughts on “In a Perfect World….”

  1. Well said Carolyn. Where it gets a little fuzzy is…. should we really respect everybody? There is an old adage that respect should be earned and, based on that, do law breakers deserve our respect? That gets even more complex because we have to understand why they broke the law, which then poses the question “Is there ever an acceptable reason for breaking the law?”
    I like the idea that we should respect everybody, but perhaps showing compassion to everybody is a little more realistic? I cannot respect somebody who uses a gun to resolve their issues however, given that they were clearly raised in a “gun supporting” society, and given that the examples set to them may well have been conducive to getting a gun to resolve disputes, then perhaps compassion would be more appropriate?
    As you focused on gun use, I don’t understand the concept (in the US) that where there are various legitimate para-military groups (Local police, State police, FBI)… yet gun bearers justify their gun with the “self defense” argument! Either the various levels of law enforcement are not doing their job, or ……..!
    I am really curious to read what Comments you get! 🙂

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    • After I posted this I got to thinking about exactly what you said about the line getting fuzzy with respect. Maybe compassion would be more appropriate, BUT in a perfect world there would be no lawbreakers, so we wouldn’t worry about that part 🙂
      The question about the US and guns is a tricky question and I wish I fully understood how we got to the place where we are at. I gotta run now, but will get back to you.

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    • Oh boy, gun rights in the U.S. It’s a difficult topic, but I think it’s a combination of history, general lack of trust in the government, and a failure on the part of the legitimate police forces. The first two I suppose are both historical and even though most of my family can go on ad nauseam about their right to bear arms, I still don’t quite understand.
      Most police forces now are there to serve, not necessarily protect – in other words, they’ve become much more reactive vs proactive. Granted that’s been forced on them through various lawsuits and other efforts to make this world a very “politically correct” place. It’s everyone’s fault and no one’s, but it fosters that lack of trust unfortunately. No “good” excuses and no “easy” answers.

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      • You summed it up pretty well! As my sister said, “I can understand why other countries don’t understand us. We don’t understand ourselves!” What I keep having a problem with is everyone talks about how they want the right to bear arms to protect themselves. OK, BUT…the articles I see in the paper every day and on the news, are RARELY of instances that guns were actually used for protection! Just last week, another story of a 7 year old accidentally shooting and killing his friend. They were playing like boys do, 7 year old grabbed his Dad’s gun, he didn’t know it was loaded and all it took was one shot. A month ago a Dad shot and killed his 4 year old when gun went off accidentally. These stories are WAY too frequent and I just shake my head and think how something’s gotta change!

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    • I live here and I don’t understand it. I have relatives who are gun owners with permits to carry concealed. They don’t express doubt in the police’s ability to do their job. When questioned, they seem to be worried about a situation that demands immediate protection. Quite frankly it worries me.

      Living in the Chicago area, where we wake up nearly every morning to news of yet another innocent victim of gun violence, it makes even less sense. I think Carolyn’s sister says it perfectly- we don’t understand ourselves. And Carolyn is right- very rarely are we hearing that someone who was shot was done so by a person defending themselves. It’s all senseless and it’s the reason that people feel so strongly one way or the other when it comes to a person’s right to have a gun.

      In Carolyn’s perfect world, if we all showed each other even a basic level of respect, I believe that would make a great difference in helping work toward a more peaceful world. In the world we live in now, we should show compassion for those how have led a life disrespected. People should still be held accountable for their actions but there’s no reason they cannot also be shown respect and compassion.

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  2. Great post JR! It would be wonderful if this were a perfect world and there were no more crimes and crimes against humanity. Respect is truly a big one! And you are right about how we have become use to hearing about school shootings that we aren’t shocked anymore. It is shocking and should be shocking and must be stopped.

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  4. Respect would change a lot. I agree. I think in a perfect world we would be happy with who we are and let others be themselves. There would be no need for comparison or jealousy, as you say everyone would be “respected” for whoever they are and their talents would all be unique and no judgement would occur. People would be born without disease of any kind, not carrying any possibility of it in their genes or DNA. Not susceptible to Cancer or PTSD (you couldn’t be traumatized) there would be no depression or Bipolar disease. Hearts would not have attacks and their would be no strokes. People would not be careless or stupid, or be affected by other people’s carelessness or stupidity. There would be no people without consciousness. We would no right and wrong and only do right. We would have an understanding, an awareness of each other (everyone with everyone else) and be kind to everyone and again respectful. There would be no lack of energy, motivation, or sleepiness when you had things to do. We wouldn’t know what pain was, or have an inkling of how it felt. I could go on, but that covers a lot of it 🙂 Wonderful piece. It really makes one think.

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  5. I have a friend who cannot bring himself to agree with anyone – if I say the sky is blue, he’ll point to the white clouds! Sometimes I like to make bold statements to get a rise out of him (it’s mutual fun) and that’s where this came from, with the fundamental argument being – can you really take anything out of this world without grave consequence? Or, as he put it, is Utopia really possible? (at which point I tapped out and conceded, as per usual – one day!…)
    Anyway, so when I put this forward yesterday, I was thinking that it could go any number of ways, and I was really interested in where you took it. Thank you for writing this! It’s something I happen to agree with wholeheartedly and feel we really should be discussing more. The way I was raised, there were almost two levels of respect – the fundamental respect you should have for yourself in not treating others badly (aka the Golden Rule), and the greater (additional) respect that was earned through various actions.
    I feel like we increasingly forget the Golden Rule – it doesn’t matter really what someone else has done, only how we react to it, which is all that we can control anyway. Maybe if we could be more respectful to others on a fundamental “you are another human” level then, like you pointed out above, a lot of our problems would resolve themselves. It’s certainly something to think about!

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  6. What’s underneath all the disrespect is fear, I would say. People can’t deal with so much change happening so fast. They feel like they’re under attack, like their whole culture is under attack, like they’re never going to be safe anywhere. Not just the gun owners, but lots of people — there is so much anxiety in the modern world. And you are right that small acts of kindness are what is needed to turn it around.

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  7. I agree. Respect goes a long way. Reading this piece, gave me a new perspective to things- respecting others to avoid violence. It’s true, we would never knowingly hurt someone we respect, so why do we find it hard to respect everyone?!
    A food for thought Joy, thank you for this piece. I am glad to see it has sparked some insightful comments too.

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  8. An interesting post and comments. I’m a bit late to the discussion but as a Brit now living in Australia, I must admit I do not understand that the USA takes no action to it’s many mass shootings.
    In 1996 in the UK, a man killed 16 children and their teacher in a school in Dunblane. He had four legally owned hand guns. Gun laws were tightened in the aftermath and there has been no mass shooting in the UK since. The initial change in the law was not necessarily popular with certain groups of society but the law was passed anyway.
    Also in 1996 in Australia there was a massacre of 35 people at the historical tourist site of Port Arthur. Here also gun laws were restricted in the months that followed, with the expected positive results. No mass shootings in Australia for the past twenty years.
    I am not used to seeing police armed. It was a noticeable change in London during the 2012 Olympics but not a permanent situation. I don’t understand how people claim to feel safer in a society where gun ownership is the norm.

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