“The worst battle is between what you feel and what you know.”
Your eyes are brimming with tears, you can’t take your eyes off of it! How can you be holding this newborn baby in your arms? How can it be yours? They look so adorable and you feel that you will be blissfully happy all the days of its life. How could you not for of course it will be the perfect baby.
2 months down the road, your eyes are brimming with tears and you are feeling like you are going to lose it for this “perfect” baby has been crying for the past 8 hours straight! “Welcome to the wonderful world of Colic”, your Dr says and you feel scared about the days to come, but you know that you still love this screaming baby no matter what!
3 years down the road your tired toddler does not want a nap! They do not feel tired they say, but you know different and you know how they will be later on if that nap is not taken. In ways you feel it would be easier to not fight with them to take a nap, but in the end you know it will be worth it.
10 years down the road your child becomes a teenager and news flash everything you thought you knew goes out the window!! You thought you had got a handle on this parenting thing but now you are really beginning to question your sanity. Or should I say what is left of your sanity. Your eyes brim with tears again. If this describes how you are feeling right now, this post is for you 🙂
We don’t mean to, but you you know we do. We think in our minds of what our children will be like and we kinda plan their future. “Yes honey arranged marriages do still exist, you are marrying the neighbor boy, we decided that when you were 5.” Ok that problem solved. You feel that as a whole you got things planned out, but then SURPRISE! You realize that your children are not puppets on a string. They have their own minds and they make their own choices. Remember the independence you taught them. “This is how you use a spoon, this is how you get dressed, etc.” and you were so proud to see them growing up.
I will make it clear that I am very proud of my kids! They have come through some very hard obstacles and I wouldn’t trade them for the world! They each have such a unique personality and I could go on and on. What I wanted to stress in this post tho was that there are days, months, years where it can get very scary as a parent. Where things happen out of your control and you feel like , “What did I do? ” and you want to beat yourself up over thinking , what if…BUT you can’t do that! Get rid of those feelings and grab hold onto what YOU KNOW. YOU KNOW you love your kids unconditionally and you KNOW that your kids know that and that knowing your loved is so very important!
You may be saying, “But you don’t understand what I am dealing with?” ” I never thought my child would go through something like this, would get involved with this, would do this?” I want to tell you that you are not alone! That I have been there! That I am there and that there is really probably very little that you can say that I haven’t dealt with yet. It’s hard to open up about painful subjects I know, so I haven’t been real verbal online; but have been gently encouraged to let others know that they are not alone in this battle of raising the next generation. Kids are facing things today that my husband and I never had to face. Any of you remember that comedy, “A Different World”, from back in the 80’s? The world is very different now!
I just want to encourage you to not give up and to stop it with the guilt trip! Does no one any good. I mean now if there are things that you truly have to apologize to your kids for than by all means do it! A sincere apology definitely goes a long way, but don’t guilt yourself over your kids struggling with different issues. Right now your kids need you more than ever. Yes when they were little they needed us to help them learn things, but they need us just as much now. Only in a different way. Don’t give up! Your love and your prayers will get everyone through! Even the darkest tunnel does eventually show light!